Inadequate

One of the banes of my walk as a home-learning mama are the feelings of inadequacy that ebb and flow. Sometimes the immensity of being responsible for fostering a lifelong love of learning in my three charges feels very overwhelming. On the "good" days when the household runs smoothly, we're all happy and relaxed, enjoying one anothers company and our learning I finish the day feeling proud of the environment I'm helping to create.

Then there are plenty of "other" days when I struggle to press down the inadequacy, panic when it bubbles back up to the surface, question whether we should have "outsourced" this aspect of our parenting, and I rush to the 'workbook' cupboard and make the girls sit up at the table. At least if they "look" as if they're learning I'm doing something right, right?

Or if I have pretty displays then visitors will think I have it all together and won't worry about what my children are missing out on at school?

Or if I have a real pencil sharpener then I'm a "real" teacher, right?

I wrap the memories of the "good" days around me as I tell the children it's "Mummy's turn to use the sharpener".